As I've well stated (over and over again ad nauseum) I've been super lazy. Not even just a little lazy, but super duper lazy about exercising. It's sickening to think had I kept on track I'd be another 20lbs down with only 40 to go. But oh no. I lapsed. I lost my "competition" so to speak when everyone quit on me. From there I went to not so great food choices. It's not like I ate a whole cheesecake or anything, but I allowed myself chips. I know! *GASP* Bad bad bad. At least I've "maintained" and not gained anything back. Haven't lost either though. I got a big push this past weekend to get back on the stick when my mom landed herself in the hospital for acute cellulitis.
Apparently being morbidly obese and diabetic is super bad when it comes to infections. Duh I know, but still... it's a wake up call I need to get back on track and stick with it for the health of it. She went from 3 days of 3 different IV meds at one hospital only to be transferred to Dartmouth Hitchcock for a more indepth look at whats going on. I don't want to be that someday. I don't want to be so big I can't fit on the stretcher they're using to transport me. I don't want my body to be a death sentence. I want to live... and live well. I want to run on the treadmill and not die after a minute of it. I was doing so good and allowed my focus to waiver. Not again. This needs to be my religion. I know I can reach my goal I have no doubt in that. It's the Faith it takes to get there that is shaky when the foods I like are so convienent and I don't want to stand around and make them or go thru the expense of buying myself one thing and everyone else something different because they don't want to "diet". But I'm not dieting... I'm changing habits for the better. Probably to just be hit by a car or some freak accident, but at least my body won't burn for days because of the fat content.
So this is me... trying to get back on board with my plans. Summers here and there are no excuses. The pool is up... the sun is shining to go for walks... no excuses. Only progress!
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